


several people are typing

by oops_I_lost_my_marbles



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Bi Ladybug, IDENTITY SHENANIGANS, Identity Reveal, Maribug, POV Third Person, Shipping wars, Swearing, Texting, chloe doesn't have a miraculous au, group chat au, group chat with the main 4 heroes in it, how do any of them function at this point, ladynette, no one knows anyone's identities yet, they're all idiots, time to plan a wedding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-09
Updated: 2020-09-30
Packaged: 2021-03-07 00:47:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 11,531
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26368171
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oops_I_lost_my_marbles/pseuds/oops_I_lost_my_marbles
Summary: When Ladybug gives her private cell phone number to Adrien Agreste, the last thing she expected was Chat Noir to text her at 2:30 in the morning.  Next thing you know, Ladybug has a crush on Marinette- and all of Paris knows about it. Stay tuned for a collection of startling discoveries made by the residential dumbasses of Paris. Except, it happens over text- which makes everything simultaneously better and worse.
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug, Alya Césaire/Nino Lahiffe, Marinette Dupain-Cheng/Ladybug
Comments: 73
Kudos: 406





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So you’ve seen me write adrichat, here’s a little maribug for fun;)
> 
> Credit to My Miraculous Headcanons on tumblr with this wonderful headcanon! Go check out their stuff, it’ll have you scrolling for hours(I know from personal experience lol). Here’s the exact link to the post I used for inspiration: https://my-miraculous-headcanons.tumblr.com/post/178583073739/maribugladynette
> 
> Thank you again to my wonderful betas- Gianna and Katherine.
> 
> Enjoy!

_Direct Message: Adrien to Ladybug (8:39 pm)_

**Adrien:** Hey, thanks for stopping by earlier! 

**LB:** anytime! <3

oops my hand slipped eriwhbvgr

**Adrien:** Dude ladybug just gave me her number this is the best day of my life

**LB:**?????

**Adrien:** Ignore that, my voice to text was enabled ahaha.

**LB:** lol ok

**Adrien:** ...I’m just curious. Does anyone else have your number? Like, Chat Noir?

**LB:** uhhh no. I just got this phone and I haven’t given the number out yet

**Adrien:** Oh, ok.

Well, goodnight. Get some beauty rest.

It’s not like you need it though.

**LB:** ieurfjrklethjgefwqk

* * *

_Direct Message: Chat Noir to Ladybug (2:31 am)_

**CN:** Hey.

**LB:** sorry, who is this? I don’t have your number saved

**CN:** You wound me, milady.

It’s your favorite partner.

**LB:** how did you get my number?????

**CN:** I have my ways. ;)

**LB:** I’m rolling my eyes at you

why are you awake so late?

*early

**CN:** I couldn’t sleep.

Why are you up?

**LB:** sleep is for the weak

**CN:** Yeah.

…

At least it will be easier to get ahold of each other when there’s an akuma now.

**LB:** I still don’t know how you got my number

**CN:** That’s top secret information.

**LB:** well I’m going to sleep

gn chat

**CN:** “gn”?

**LB:** do you live under a rock or something? it means goodnight

**CN:** Oh. Goodnight, bug.

* * *

_Direct Message: Chat Noir to Ladybug_ _(6:17 am)_

**CN:** Akuma alert. Near the Agreste Mansion.

**LB:** are you fucking serious.

**CN:** Uh, yeah.

Sorry.

**LB:** there goes my plan to sleep for another hour before school

...let’s be perfectly honest, that wasn’t going to happen anyway

still

screw hawkmoth

he seriously sucks

**CN:** How close are you? I’m on the sidelines but it’s getting bad.

The akuma is super destructive.

There’s like five tornadoes and honestly I don’t know what else.

**LB:** I’m putting on my fuzzy socks and then transforming

it’s cold outside and I am not getting frostbite

**CN:** Ok. Hurry.

**LB:** going to punch hawkmoth in the face brb

**CN:** ...What?

* * *

_Direct Message from Ladybug to Chat Noir (7:02 am)_

**LB:** are you ok? I saw you get thrown across paris and it didn’t look good

**CN:** I’ve been better. Your miraculous cure fixed most of it.

I might be bruised tomorrow. 

**LB:** I’m so sorry Chat. I wish I could’ve been more help

**CN:** Well, it was a super dangerous akuma. I didn’t want you to get hurt. 

It was bad enough as is. It wiped out the entire block. 

Luckily school wasn’t in session yet or else it could’ve been worse.

Did you already check in with the civilians or should I?

**LB:** oh shit. no I didn’t. I was focusing on getting ready for school

**CN:** Ok. I’ll swing around real quick.

Just finished talking to Adrien. His family is fine.

There was no one at the school that I could see so I think everyone’s fine.

Let me go check on Marinette real quick and then I’ll head home.

**LB:** uhh I already checked in with Marinette. she’s fine

**CN:** Are you sure? I saw her right before the attack. 

That akuma picked her up and threw her 20 feet through the air.

Even with your cure, I doubt she’s fine.

**LB:** she can handle it

if not, she’ll suck it up and say she’s fine anyway

**CN:** How would you know?

You know what? You’re always super jumpy whenever I mention Marinette.

Like, I want her to use the mouse miraculous again, but for some reason, you won’t let her.

Whenever her name is even mentioned, you avoid her and move to the next subject.

What’s going on with you? Why are you acting like that?

**LB:** drop it, chat. I have to go to school.

**CN:** See? That’s exactly what I’m talking about.

You can escape this temporarily but we’re talking about it more tonight.

* * *

_Direct Message: Chat Noir to Ladybug (5:49 pm)_

**CN:** I know you have to be out of school because I just saw you swing past my window.

Answer me.

**LB:** ?????

you saw me?

I swung past your house?

wow. what a coincidence

huh

**CN:** You can’t escape my question. 

**LB:** rgefvihnj

fine.

I guess… we just don’t get along.

**CN:** Wait, what? Why?

And how?

Marinette is literally the sweetest.

I always thought you two would get along so well.

She’s like an everyday Ladybug.

**LB:** drop it.

I don’t want to talk about this anymore.

**CN:** I just don’t get it.

Why don’t you like Marinette?

What did she do to you?

…

You’re ignoring me, aren’t you?

Fine, but I will bring this up again.

* * *

_Direct Message: Adrien to Marinette (6:54 pm)_

**Adrien:** Hey, Marinette!

**Marinette:** rgdskjaegr

Adrien! hi!

**Adrien:** How are you doing?

**Marinette:** fantastic, now that I get to talk to you

I mean

oh god

uh 

I like texting all my friends! it makes me happy! so

**Adrien:** Nice! :)

Anyway, is there anyone you don’t get along with? I was just wondering.

**Marinette:** hmm no I don’t think so

I mean, Chloe is Chloe, but other than that I get along with everyone

wait oh no

do you think that we don’t get along?

gefvdickngetfs

no no no

I love you

*I love talking to you

sorry 

autocorrect lol

**Adrien:** That’s what I thought. 

Thanks, Marinette! :)

**Marinette:** no problem! <3

oops my hand slipped lol 

clumsy me

**Adrien:** I’ll see you at school tomorrow!

**Marinette:** yeah, see you at school tomorrow

* * *

_Direct Message: Marinette to Alya (7:13 pm)_

**Marinette:** I screwed up

Adrien ahtes me now

*hates

**Alya:** girl what are you talking about? everyone loves you

adrien included

he just doesn’t know it yet

**Marinette:** * _sent_ _screenshot.jpg_ _*_

**Alya:** i’m sorry but

girl how do you get yourself into these situations

you’re a mess

**Marinette:** :(

**Alya:** hold on i gotta go

just got another text

i’ll text you back in a sec

* * *

_Chat Noir created a Group Chat (7:16 pm)_

_Chat Noir added Ladybug, Rena Rouge, and Carapace to the Group Chat (7:17 pm)_

_Chat Noir named the Group Chat_ ‘barbie and the three musketeers’ _(7:19 pm)_

**CN:** Tag yourself. I’m the purple one with ribbons.

**RR:** hi who are you? 

**CN:** I thought I was clear the first time.

I’m the purple one with ribbons.

I just googled it, her name is Viveca.

I’m Viveca.

**RR:** …

how did you access this number? it’s a private line

**CN:** I have my ways. ;)

**LB:** chat noir I swear to all things holy

if you made a group chat with the rest of us in it I’m going to step on you

**CN:** I would gladly be stepped on by you, bugaboo.

**RR:** no. fucking. way.

i’m in a superhero group chat?

omg wrefvihbgknfvds

going to go cry brb

**CN:** Ok, but you guys are missing the important point.

Which musketeer are you from Barbie and the 3 Musketeers?

**LB:** chat, now is not the time.

**CN:** Why? Are you busy doing something else?  
Like…

Forming more of a vendetta against Marinette?

I’m never letting that go.

**LB:** greifvhkn fine chat shut up

I’m Corinne I guess

it’s only fair because I’m the leader

also I’m a natural klutz

**RR:** i must be in heaven

ladybug I love you so much

please step on me

**CN:** Sorry, she already has reservations to step on me tonight.

Are you free tomorrow?

**RR:** i’m free any day if it means ladybug is gonna be there

...

wait a minute

what’s going on with marinette? and which marinette are we talking about

**CN:** Ladybug hates Marinette.

Marinette Dupain-Cheng. Her parents run that bakery that has the best dragon fruit macarons?

**LB:** HOLD ON chat I do Not hate Marinette

hate is a strong word

I told you

we just don’t get along

**RR:** efrebvwhjdkn that’s impossible

marinette gets along with everyone

that girl won’t even hold a grudge against chloe

and no one likes chloe

**LB:** Lila?

**RR:** lila’s a bitch. everyone hates her.

**CN:** Fair point.

**C:** hi who are you &

what’d I miss

**LB:** hi Carapace

are you quoting hamilton?

**RR:** ah i knew someone was missing from this chat

FEIWBHVK LADYBUG LISTENS TO HAMILTON

**CN:** Please guys. Let’s get back on track.

Which musketeer are you from 3 musketeers?

**C:** aramina , hands down

**CN:** Bro...

**C:** bro

**CN:** ...you’re totally right

**LB:**...I feel like I’m intruding on your moment

*bro-ment

**RR:** glad i wasn’t the only one 

**CN:** Rena, that means you’re Renée by default but I think it’s fitting.

Wait, did Ladybug just make a pun?

I’m in love.

**RR:** no way, lover boy. ladybug is mine

ANYWAY back to marinette ????

i just cannot comprehend

**CN:** Me neither.

**LB:** you guys are acting like children.

it’s none of your business.

**CN:** I’m acting like a child?

I’m not the one avoiding this conversation like it’s the plague.

Just give me one (1) valid reason why you don’t like her.

**C:** dudes just leave her alone

if she doesn’t wanna talk about it, don’t push it

**LB:** thank you, Carapace.

**C:** wait hold on

I just scrolled up

Ladybug doesn’t like Marinette?

that’s wack bro

**LB:** erlkregtj

**CN:** I just don’t understand how you could hate her enough that you can’t even bother to properly protect her! 

Is that why you just left me by myself during the Evillustrator incident?

**LB:** for the last time, I don’t hate her.

drop it.

I’m serious.

I have my reasons.

I do not have to share them with you.

**CN:** If you don’t hate Marinette, then why do you have such a difficult time being anywhere near her? 

And now that I think about it, you freeze up whenever she’s mentioned.

…

Except that one time when you sent me a picture of her and asked me if

… 

Oh my jesus

**RR:** wait

you can’t just leave me on a cliffhanger like that

chat noir

what did she ask

Hello

?????

**CN:** Holy shit.

**RR:** you need to tell me right now before i explode 

chat nori i swear

tell be ight now

**C:** chat nori

**RR:** shut up udmbass

**C:** udmbass

**CN:** I can’t believe I didn’t see it before.

**RR:** see WHAT

i stg this is not some slow burn fic just give me the tea

asap 

**CN:** Ladybug is

**LB:** wait pleas hold on

don’t jump to conclusions

I’m not who you think I am

you’re wrong 

Marinette and I can’t be the saem person

how could you ever think that

**CN:** Ladybug is in love with Marinette.

**C:** dude why did it take you so long to type that

**LB:** oh ahaha

lol ignore me

**RR:** wait LADYBU IS GAY

how did you know

i need prrof now

**CN:** ...Ladybug asked me if Marinette was cute.

**RR:** OH MY GOD LADYBUG IS GAY EWBIFKRGCFSKSVF

THIS IS THE BEST DAY OG MY LIFE RBVIHNK

**CN:** Ladybug, do you have a crush on Marinette?

…

I can see that you’re still active.

By saying nothing, you’re confirming our beliefs.

**RR:** oh my god ladybug is gay and she has a crush on marinette

**C:** sorry babe. guess you’ll have to settle for someone else

**RR:** yeah i have a boyfriend

just

he knows that ladybug comes first

and that if she ever agreed to date me, we’re breaking up

**CN:** Honestly, I want a relationship liek that.

**like

Oops.

**C:** yeah my girl is kinda like that

I’m 95% sure she’s only jokeing though lol

**RR:** everyone has a crush on ladybug

sorry to break it to you, cara, but uh your girlfriend isn’t joking

**CN:** F.

**C:** dude if you’re gonna type an f then stop texting like my grandma

nvm my grandma uses lol and fifty emojis in every sentence 

you’re worst than my grandma

**RR:** f

**CN:** Yeah, sorry. I’m not good at texting.

I’m normally not allowed to text people a lot.

My father is kinda strict.

**C:** no sweat, dude. I know someone like that

you’ll learn in no time

**RR:** well it’s about that time folks

it’s almost 1 in the morning

time to go cry myself to sleep bc ladybug is crushing on marinette

**CN:** Mood.

**C:** gn, rena

* * *

_Ladybug messaged_ ‘barbie and the three musketeers’ _(5:43 am)_

**LB:** I am going to kill all of you.

simultaneously.

**C:** woah that’s a big word

**RR:** you dumbass 

i learned how to say that word in second grade

wait lb why are you killing us!

?**

**LB:** _*sent_ _screenshot.jpg_ _*_

**C:** oh shit

**CN:** Sorry, I just woke up. What’s going on?

**C:** alrighty who snitched

it wasn’t me

**CN:** Wait what’s going on?

The screenshot won’t load for me.

**C:** basically it’s a news article and the headline says “superheroine ladybug is crushing on civilian baker girl”

and there’s a screenshot of our conversation

**CN:** Oh no.

Bug, this is all my fault.

I’m so sorry.

**LB:** I thought you had more braincells than this

honestly I guess I’m just shocked

I thought I could trust you

**CN:** I should have never brought up your crush

I’m so so sorry

**LB:** it’s fine, chat

like I said, I’m just disappointed that you would freely give out our private screenshots

I don’t think we should keep doing this chat thing.

it’s dangerous, especially if hakwmoth gets ahold of one of us

**CN:** Wait a minute

Bug, I didn’t post the pictures.

I didn’t even take screenshots

**LB:** how can I trust you?

how can I trust any of you?

how do I know that you aren’t secretly hawkmoth?

**C:** ouch .

**RR:** i have to be honest

it was me

…

i posted it on my anonymous tumblr page

no one was going to believe it! i didn’t know it would blow up overnight

ladybug i am so sorry 

i didn’t mean for this to get out of hand

i swear i didn’t mean to out you to paris

i’m so sorry

**LB:** honestly I don’t care who did it at this point.

Chat, please delete this chat

I don’t know how to

and if any of you are smart, you would delete my number

**CN:** Hold on.

This is going to be extremely helpful to have this chat for akumas.

We don’t need to delete it, just don’t give out your phone password.

And whatever you do, don’t let Hawkmoth see

**LB:** chat.

**CN:** Look, Ladybug. I know you’re upset.

I know you just got publicly outed

But you’re acting irrationally

I know you probably didn’t want Marinette to find out

But

**LB:** look.

this has NOTHING to do with my crush on Marinette.

what the hell

I literally don’t even have a crush on Marinette

why is this happening to me

gerihjjk

**RR:** give me one reason to believe that you aren’t crushing on her

why else would you be so mad that all this was happening?

**LB:** I’m just, concerned?

I mean,

Hawkmoth (being the dumb bitch he is) will probably target her now

I’m worried about her.

**RR:** look, maybe you didn’t know it before but

all the signs are there

you obviously have a crush on her

you might’ve been oblivious to it before but uh

it’s pretty obvious

**C:** right.

my best friend is an absolute dumbass obivoious little shit

he doesn’t have a clue that one of our friends is crushing on him SO BAD

you probably didn’t know it before but everyone else saw it

**RR:** ‘obivoious’

you’re an idiot babe

go back to first grade

**C:** harsh.

**CN:** ANYWAY.

Ladybug, I am so sorry you had to find out this way.

But Ladybug? 

I want you to know that I’m here for you.

Maybe you’re still questioning

And I know it’s probably hard because all of Paris knows you’re gay now

But

I’m here for you

(and can I please be the flower girl at yours and Marinette’s wedding?)

(pretty please?)

**LB:** can you all SHUT UP

no one even asked me about my side of the story

and no one checked to see if I’m even into girls

stop escalating the situation

**RR:** sorry lb

but

…

are you into girls?

i need to know

asking for a friend

(literally)

**LB:** is this important

**RR:** yes.

i need to know or i won’t be able to sleep at night

**LB:** …

yeah I like girls

you cannot tell ANYONE

no screenshots this time

**C:** omg Maribug is basically canon now

SORRY LB DIDNT MEAN TO TYPE THAT 

**RR:** f

but at the same time

I need to go text Marinette

see how she’s holding up

**C:** it’s gonna be real weird when a superhero just texts you

like

‘hey my pal LB has a big boi crush on you’

‘would you like to date her by any chance’

**RR:** ahaha yeah 

wouldn’t it be weird if i knew her in real life?

ahahah what a coincedence

**LB:** NO IDENTITY SHENANIGANS

we don’t know who everyone is for a reason

also I’m starting school in a few minutes I have to go

plus my friends keep looking at me weird

I’m usually not on my phone this much.

**RR:** ladybug has FRIENDS?

how i wish i was Ladybug’s friend

**LB:** of course.

do you really think that someone as cool as me wouldn’t have friends?

and you are my friend Rena

**RR:** ewgrjkef

ladybug considers me her friend

rkjbh

* * *

_Direct Message: Alya to Marinette (11:58 am)_

**A:** hey girl.

what’s up with adrien

he’s been out of it all day

**M:** you think I know?

I’ve hardly talked to him

ask your bf

**A:** k

**M:** tell me what he says.

but yeah he’s been acting like someone just died all day

* * *

_Direct Message: Alya to Nino (12:03 pm)_

**A:** hey babe.

what’s up with adrien

he’s been out of it all day

**N:** idk

he won’t talk to me

I’ll text him after school gets out

**A:** k

* * *

_Direct Message: Nino to Adrien (4:33 pm)_

**N:** hey bro

how are you doing?

you seemed to be having a rough day.

everything alright?

**A:** Yeah I’m ok.

…

Have you ever fallen in love with the wrong person?

**N:** ??? wdym

**A:** What do you mean?

**N:** exactly… nevermined.

what were you saying?

**A:** I’ve been in love with this girl

But, I just found out that

Uh

She likes girls.

**N:** oh shit

That seriously sucks

wait who is it? 

**A:** You wouldn’t believe me if I told you

* * *

_Direct Message: Nino to Alya (4:36 pm)_

**N:** HOLY SIHT

ADRIEN IS IN LOVE WITH MAGNET

**A:** who the fuck is magnet

* * *

_Direct Message: Adrien to Nino (4:37 pm)_

**A:** Anyway. She’s this amazing girl

I don’t see how everyone is in love with her

She helps everyone out and she’s so kind

She makes me laugh when I feel like crap

She is a shoulder to cry on

She is beautiful

I get lost in her eyes every day

Every. Damn. Day.

And I just learned that there’s no way she’ll ever like me.

**N:** oh my god

my otp

**A:** ????

**N:** I’ll have to text you back later bro

Something just popped up

I’m so sorry

**A:** Ok

* * *

_Direct Message: Nino to Alya (4:41 pm)_

**N:** marinette*

sorry my autocorrect sucks

**A:** wait a minute.

WAIT A DAMN MINUTE

**N:** I know right????

 _*sent_ _screenshot.jpg_ _*_

it’s so obvious

**A:** this is the best day of my life

marinette is going to be so happy

**N:** we can;t tell her yet! 

he has to find out on his own

and she has to find a way to subtly drop hints that although she likes girls, she also happens to like guys

(specifically by the name of Adrien Agreste)

**A:** how does mari get herself into these messes

she truly is a bi disaster

* * *

_Direct Message: Chat Noir to Ladybug (11:06 pm)_

**CN:** Hey.

**LB:** hey.

**CN:** I know it’s late but can you call?

I want to hear your voice

**LB:** of course, kitty

_*chat noir started a call*_

_*call ended (02:26:53)*_

**LB:** goodnight, chat

**CN:** Goodnight, milady

* * *

_Direct Message: Ladybug to Rena Rouge (1:44 am)_

**LB:** I think I’m in love with Chat Noir.

CRAP SHIT OH MY GOD WRONG NUMBER

HOW DO YOU DELETE TEXT 

SHOOT SHOOT SHOOT SHit

_*Ladybug deleted a text*_

_*Ladybug deleted a text*_

_*Ladybug deleted a text*_

_*Ladybug deleted a text*_

**RR:** hey lb

did you need something?

**LB:** nope! everything is peachy :)

* * *

_Direct Message: Marinette to Alya (1:49 am)_

**M:** I think I’m in love with Chat Noir.

**A:** are you kidding me

ladybug is in love with you and now you’re in love with her sidechick?

this is becoming a love triangle

**M:** look if you heard his voice at midnight when he’s half asleep, you’d fall in love with him too.

**A:** no i wouldn’t because i love Ladybug more than i’d ever love him

**M:** rude

**A:** what? It’s true

besides, why are you telling me this?

and why are you on the phone with chat noit past midnight?

**M:** chat noit lol

**A:** you know what i meant dimwit

**M:** I guess I just wanted to tell someone

I hate keeping secrets

**A:** yeah ok

i understand that

**M:** anyway goodnight!!!!

I’ll see you tomorrow at school

**A:** see ya girly <3

* * *

_Rena Rouge messaged_ ‘barbie and the three musketeers’ _(3:23 am)_

**RR:** i ain’t gonna sleep cause of y’all

yall ain’t gonna sleep cause of me 

-hawkmoth’s senior quote, probably

**C:** ????

**RR:** akuma near Agreste Mansion

hurry it’s getting bad

**C:** omw

**RR:** @Ladybug @Chat Noir where are you guys

we need backu-p

adrien (that one model kid) got akumatized

he’s keeping marinette hostage 

…

guys I’m serious wake up

the akuma is brutal

he’s causing people physical pain and his powers are just amplifying it

carapace and I are getting destroyed

Help

…

guys I literally can’t do this anymore

carapce just got chucked across paris

he’s unconscious

we’re hiding behind a dumpster

i think my ankle is broken

I need you

…

i’m scared

@Ladybug @Chat Noir

please 

maybe you got wrapped up in the akuma 

maybe you’re part of its army

but no one can save us if you don’t show up

…

where are you guys

* * *

_Ladybug messaged_ ‘barbie and the three musketeers’ _(1:01 pm)_

**LB:** ok debrief time

I am so sorry. this is all my fault.

thank god school got cancelled so that I can talk to you guys

rena, cara- you guys were perfect. I am so sorry I wasn’t there for you.

**RR:** it’s ok

we survived

that’s all that matters

**C:** we barely survived

where were you guys

**LB:** it’s a long story

**RR:** I guess we have all day

**LB:** ok so

I was out on my balcony at my house. couldn’t sleep.

I saw the akuma fly towards Adrien’s house

I transformed and started chasing it

I was too late. I watched him get akumatized

he instantly turned on me, demanding that I brought Marinette to him

uh

I couldn’t move though? it’s like I was frozen in place

anytime I tried to move, I felt like I was being set on fire

I was stuck like that for hours

I couldn’t move or see anything

then after a while, I whispered lucky charm and got a rose?

idk

anyway I ended up detransforming after a while and Adrien just went into shock

he went ballistic and started screaming at hawkmoth

the akuma just fricking popped out of his ring

and that was that.

my kwami ended up getting a bite to eat while I was still frozen

after the akuma got released, I transformed and purified the akuma

did the miraculous cure

and made sure adrien was alright

that’s it.

**C:** wait so adrien knows who you are ?

**LB:** no I don’t think so

I asked him afterwards if he remembered anything from the attack and he said no

he wanted to make sure I was alright though

**CN:** Hey ladybug?

I really need someone to talk to right now

**RR:** explain yourself first

where were you? you left us all alone

you better have a good reason

**CN:** I can’t answer that

**LB:** why not, Chat?

**CN:** It’ll reveal my identity

and that’s a big no-no

**LB:** honestly Chat at this point hawkmoth himself probably knows who I am

I could only have minutes before he comes for me

**CN:** Hold on a sec. 

I have to mess around with something real quick

_*Chat Noir added Hawkmoth to_ ‘barbie and the three musketeers’ _*_

**C:** you did not just do that

**RR:** you slimy son of a bitch

i’m glad i finally get to say that to your face

i ahte you

you can’t see me but i’m flipping you off rn

**HM:** What is this? How did you access my number?

**CN:** Hello, Hawkmoth. Just had a few questions for you.

First of all, did you find out Ladybug’s identity in the last battle?

**HM:** Who are you? Reporters?

I don’t have to disclose anything.

**CN:** Answer the question. 

**HM:** Hi there! This is Hawkmoth’s personal assistant. He just handed me his phone and went to find some migraine medicine.

What can I help you with?

**LB:** what happened to his akuma last attack? did he find out who ladybug was?

**HM:** Hmm, I’m technically not allowed to disclose information like this, so I won’t.

But I will tell you that neither of us know what really happened in the end.

The akuma overpowered my boss and he lost control. This started after Ladybug used her lucky charm.

**RR:** is this mayura?

**HM:** Yes.

**RR:** girl you deserve so much better

ditch your psychotic mentally unstable mother f-ing supervillain of a bf

you can do so much better

_*Hawkmoth has left the chat*_

**RR:** well that was fun

you can tell they're serious party animals

**CN:** I think your identity is safe, Ladybug

I mean, you detransformed in front of me and I can’t remember it so

In my defense, I was akumatized so

**LB:** I detransformed in front of you? When???

wait when were you akumatized ???????

**CN:** Crap

Didn’t mean to say that

**RR:** oh my god

**LB:** ?

**CN:** ...How bad is it if someone finds out my identity?

**LB:** depends on who found out

**CN:** oh

Well I think rena is onto me

We’ve got five seconds tops before she starts spamming

**RR:** oh my god

no fricking way

**CN:** There it is.

**RR:** hold on brb

deleting all the adrichat fanfic i’ve ever wrote

bye bye ‘to all the cats I’ve loved before’ and ‘pride and paw-judice’ 

and ‘and they were roommates’

**C:** babe wtf

wait I’ve read those fics

that shit was god tier

don’t delete it

**CN:** I don’t think I want to know

**RR:** i cannot process the fact that my best friend is crushing on you as a civilian and also as a superhero

**CN:** Wait who?

Do I know her?

**RR:** do you KNOW HER?

lrgkntebv

yessir you do

oh god this is fricking hilarious

**LB:** wait a minute slow down

I don’t know what’s happening

did I miss something?

**C:** mood

**LB:** and why are you deleting your fanfics?

I think I stumbled across the second one at 1 am

or my bff sent it to me to read

REGARDLESS

stop it with the identity stuff!

**RR:** sorry babe too late

**CN:** well Rena knows who I am

why can’t everyone?

**LB:** yeah great idea

let’s all sit in a circle and announce our secret identities

Carapace, you’re up first

**C:** whaddup I’m Nino Lahiffe

**LB:** and next is

WAIT WHAT I WAS BEING SARCASTIC

**RR:** oh my god 

OH MY GOD

**C:** oh shit I screwed up 

sorry

**CN:** bro <3 we’ve been partners this whole time?

**RR:** oh my GOD

**LB:** I am going to combust

Nino you absolute idiot

I was joking

**C:** I’m sorry

**RR:** this is too good to be true omg

¾ of my closest friends turn out to be my superhero partners? no way

**C:** hold on

closest friends?

do I know you ?

**RR:** i sure hope so

i mean, we’re dating

**C:** alya? <3

**CN:** I should’ve known

**LB:** ALYA??!

**RR:** hold on 

lb do you know me in real life

hold on

do i know ladybug in real life

no way

**LB:** that’s it. 

no more.

I have had ENOUGH.

**RR:** what’s the big deal, ladybug?

if anything, it’ll make it easier to leave in the middle of class for attacks.

i can’t believe me, nino, and adrien are all superhero partners

and we had NO CLUE

**C:** wait a minute

are you telling me that Adrien is

**LB:** jesus you guys are THE WORST

stop it 

for real

**C:** Adrien is Ladybug? Bro…

**LB:** wtf

**RR:** no you dumbass

adrien is chat noir

**C:** oh thanks for spelling it out for me

actually that makes a lot of sense

no wonder we get along so well dude

**CN:** I know

**RR:** i just realized that your dream is literally going to come true chat

**CN:** What?

**RR:** we’re all most likely gonna have some part in Ladybug and Marinette’s wedding

because we’re like both of their best friends

**C:** I’ll be the rich aunt who drinks too much wine

**CN:** I’m flower girl (as aforementioned)

**RR:** i’ll be maid of honor, if Marinette and Ladybug would let me

**LB:** are you serious

we’re still planning that stupid wedding

**RR:** yeah my otp’s wedding has to be perfect

**LB:** what happened to ladynoir?

**RR:** my best friends come first

sorry chat

**LB:** well.

I guess this is a formal apology.

**RR:** what for?????

**C:** you better not be breaking up with Marinette

**LB:** there won’t be a wedding, guys.

**CN:** Yeah right

I’m going plan that if it’s the last thing I do

**LB:** it’s physically impossible!

it literally cannot happen!

**RR:** you’re just denying the inevitable

**LB:** no guys

listen to me

I am only going to say this once

Marinette and Ladybug are not getting married

because

I cannot get married to myself

_*Several people are typing…*_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ahaha I kinda already wrote an adrichat fic, so if you liked this, you’ll definitely like that. check it out!
> 
> kudos and comments are always appreciated. let me know how I’m doing! :)


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the thing.
> 
> This was supposed to be a one-shot. I only do one-shots. That's just how I work.
> 
> Somehow I found motivation to continue this fic lol. This is a one-time thing because so many of you asked for it. I really hope it lives up to your expectations. Let me know!
> 
> (plus another big thank-you to my speedy and reliable beta Katherine (@stars_and_suns). at least one of us knows how to plan a wedding<3)

_ Ladybug messaged ‘ _ barbie and the three musketeers _ ’ (5:06 pm) _

**LB:** what the hell just happened

I think the chat crashed

I had to completely restart my phone

are you guys getting my messages

**C:** uh yeah LB

holy frick

**LB:** sorry.

maybe I shouldn’t have dropped that bombshell on you guys quite yet

…

where’s chat and rena?

are they alive

**RR:** HGIEEEEEEFKNGR

**C:** there’s one

**CN:** Are you 100% sure that you’re Ladybug

**C:** and bingo 

there’s the other dumbass

I’m surprised they have enough brain cells to type right now

**LB:** what do you mean

?

yeah I’m Ladybug

I’m also, coincidentally, Marinette

believe it or not

I know we aren’t that similar

shit

I’m probably letting all of you down

sorry.

I shouldn’t have said anythign

hold on let me figure out how to delete texts again

stupud phone

**RR:** WHAT LB NO

you’re literally perfect

i’m honestly not surprised

but i am a little sad that i didn’t even notice

i’ve been idolizing my best friend and i was too blind to pick up any hints

**C:** well you aren’t the blindest one here

cough Adrien cough cough

sorry I think I’m catching a cold

**CN:** What are you saying about me????????

**C:** come on dude.

I know you’ve got a crush on ladybug. 

I’ve been in your closet. 

that shrine is honestly the most impressive thing I’ve ever seen

**RR:** I second that.

**CN:** Shut up now Lahiffe. I’m warning you.

And you’re on thin ice Rena

**LB:** did I hear that right

“shrine”

Adrien???????

**CN:** look.

You weren’t supposed to find out.

Wait a minute

why do both of you know about the shrine in my closet

Why were you in my closet?

**RR:** rich people clothes smell nice.

**C:** pretty sure it’s the perfume you use, not the clothes but

yeah 

**CN:** Why? Were? You? In? My? Closet?

**LB:** YOU HAVE A SHRINE????????

**RR:** more importantly,

WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO ABOUT THE WEDDING

**C:** stop yelling guys

I coulda dropped my croissant

**LB:** you can’t be serious.

there is no wedding.

**RR:** you and i both know that the public needs to be happy

**LB:** they’re perfectly fine? we never promised them a wedding?

**RR:** oh no

no one tell her

**LB:** tell me what?

**RR:** nothing

absolutely nothing

**C:** wait I’m confused

are we not telling her who she’s marrying

or are we not telling her about the invitations

if it’s about the invitations, I TOLD YOU she would’ve liked the yellow ones better

they had the little flowers and shit

**CN:** Pink is Marinette’s favorite color. Obviously we had to go with that one

Plus it had tiny ladybugs on it. 

It’s literally perfect.

**LB:** invitations?

you better not be saying what I think you’re saying

**RR:** you absolute MORONS

**C:** ?? what did we do now

**RR:** i specifically told you not to tell her about the invites

**C:** oh crap

I’m not great at picking up hints today

**CN:** “whaddup I’m Nino Lahiffe”

You’re damn right

**RR:** woah sunshine boy swears?

That’s a first

**CN:** :(

That’s mean

**LB:** you idiots made INVITATIONS

to a wedding that will never exist?

**RR:** in our defense…

it could have existed when we planned it

we didn’t know

ya know

that you were LB

wow i still can’t get over that

marinette is ladybug

crazy

…

i think i need some coffee

or drugs

**CN:** I picked the fonts. Wanna see them LB?

They’re almost as gorgeous as you

<3

**LB:** rgivfjngb

yeah uh sure Adrien

**CN:** _ *sent  _ _ screenshot.jpg _ _ * _

**LB:** if I wasn’t so mad at you I’d say they looked fantastic

just out of curiosity,  how many people got invited

**RR:** uh

You don’t want to know

**LB:** ????????

**C:** that’s a tricky question

let me google it real quick

**LB:** ????????????????

**C:** so there’s 2.148 million people in paris

so uh

roughly 2.148 million people got the invite

**LB:** are you fucking serious

you guys never cease to amaze me

when the fuck did you even plan this

**CN:** We definitely didn’t have any secret meetings without you to plan it…

Definitely not.

**RR:** shit chat

you blew our cover

**LB:** anything else you’d like to tell me?

any other plans I’ve been excluded from?

**C:** no I think that’s it

**RR:** sorry lb

we would’ve told you but

…

sorry i have no excuse

we wouldn’t’ve told you

**LB:** well you managed to get one thing right

Marinette AND Ladybug are both spring wedding people

**C:** ADRIEN I TOLD YOU

YOU OWE ME FIVE BUCKS

**CN:** darn >:(

* * *

_ Direct Message: Ladybug to Rena Rouge (7:40 pm) _

**LB:** alya

we need to stop planning this wedding please

**RR:** why??

it’s a joke at this point anyway

**LB:** you know why.

**RR:** ahhhhh

this has something to do with the fact that the two guys you’re crushing on now think that you’re gay huh

hmm i have a plan

**LB:** should I be worried?

Alya

…

uh oh

* * *

_ Chat Noir named the Group Chat ‘  _ time to plan a wedding’ _ (1:21 am) _

**LB:** you have to be out of your mind

**CN:** We have an obligation to the public.

Someone has to be getting married on April 1st.

**LB:** even the date is one big joke

come on guys

**CN:** ...It was the only weekend I didn’t have something going on

Sorry.

**RR:** what are y’all doing up

_ Chat Noir named the Group Chat ‘  _ time to (jokingly) plan a wedding _ ’ (1:24 am) _

**CN:** Isn’t it obvious? We’re planning the wedding.

We have most of the details but there’s still a few things to discuss

**RR:** i’m in. let’s go

**C:** me too. screw my nonexistent sleep schedule

**RR:** wow! you even spelled everything right

**C:** shut the fukc up

**RR:** fukc

**LB:** fukc

**CN:** lol

**C:** you guys are mean

**LB:** says the one who planned my entire wedding to myself behind my back

**RR:** rip

**CN:** She has a point.

Anyway, do we want Andre or Jagged as the priest?

And fondant or buttercream frosting?

And what color should the bridesmaids’ dresses be?

**RR:** ok i’d love to do this now but i need a coffee

**LB:** tell you what. meet me on my balcony in five and I’ll have four cups of coffee made

maybe I can finally convince you how bad of an idea this would be

**CN:** deal

**RR:** deal

**C:** it’ll take me a minute to sneak out, but I’ll be there

**CN:** Yeah my dad put in a new security system on my windows so I have to Indiana Jones my way out of the house

He should be sleeping though so it’ll be fine

**LB:** ok, no rush. just be quiet 

my dad would be mad if he found out I was having a wedding planning party on my balcony

@ 1 am

**RR:** maybe you could invite him?

have you even gotten his blessing to propose yet?????

**LB:** no that’s on the schedule for tuesday 

**RR:** oh my god seriously

**LB:** no.

**RR:** you’re no fun.

**LB:** thanks, Alya. 

**RR:** wait i didn’t mean it i swear

i love you

**C:** you would think you were talking to me

love you too babe

**RR:** sorry nino. it’s just

ladybug? flawless.

**LB:** hotel? trivago.

**C:** are you breaking up with me

**RR:** no not yet

i have to talk about it with my therapist first

you should know that

**C:** ok

I still love you though

please don’t break up with me

**CN:** HOLY SHTI

GUESS OH NO

**LB:** Chat? is something wrong?

**CN:** give me a sec

**LB:** sure. take your time.

do I need to call 911?

**CN:** NO.

Well

Yes?

Maybe.

**RR:** ?????? did you get kidnapped

did you fall out of your window

are you dying

**CN:** no but you might want to sit down

I did something way worse

I saw something I definitely should not have

**RR:** DID YOU WALK IN ON YOUR DAD AND NATHALIE CANOODLING

**LB:** Chat what’s going on? I’m scared

**CN:** I uh

I think I know who Hawkmoth is

**LB:** WHAThskHIGBDFsgrvh

**RR:** was hawkmoth canoodling with your dad and nathalie

oh my god

**CN:** I’ll type as I walk

Maybe I’m not thinking this through all the way

I was sneaking downstairs and I overheard Nathalie with Father

**RR:** so they WERE canoodling

called it

**CN:** And I wasn’t really listening in until my Father said something about getting a new phone number

I got super confused and everything

Then Nathalie said something like “it’s fine sir, they’ll never text you back”

I was double confused because my father doesn’t text anyone

He has the social life of a koala.

(He won’t even text me, for reference)

So I kept listening

And Father was like, “How did they get my number? Those reporters are onto me”

Nathalie replied, “go take your headache medicine again sir. I handled everything. It’ll be fine.”

At that point, nothing was really clicking

Then Father said, “I don’t have to disclose anything to them. But what if they track the number and find my lair?”

**LB:** sweet mother of cheez-its

**RR:** hold on what

i’m not following

is hawkmoth canoodling your dad and assistant or what

**CN:** I was thinking, what lair?

But then Nathalie laughed and said “they haven’t noticed the giant shipments of butterflies coming here. they won’t suspect you in the slightest.”

That’s when it clicked.

anyway I’m right out front of your house Mari

Throw down a rope or something so that I can scale your house

**LB:** that’s a lot to unpack

uh Chat just transform and then yeet yourself up

we’ll have a debrief session too once Cara gets here

**RR:** oh my god WAIT

HAWKMOTH LIVES IN YOUR HOUSe

i’ll be there in two minutes

i’m sprinting down the road

**C:** I feel like I ignore this chat for two seconds and then all the juicy stuff happens

I’ll be there in 5

* * *

_ Ladybug messaged ‘  _ time to (jokingly) plan a wedding _ ’ (5:57 am) _

**LB:** I hope you all got some sleep

that was a lot to unpack

**CN:** I couldn’t sleep a wink. 

I’m literally sleeping across the hall from the enemy.

He could steal my miraculous at any time.

**LB:** I know

I’m coming up with a plan to get you out of there

or to eliminate hawkmoth

I mean, at this point, we know his identity

we should stop him before he learns ours

**RR:** i’m with Chat

i barely slept

fortunately for you, i devised a plan 

**LB:** uh oh

**RR:** we know who hakmoth is, right?

so what’s stopping us from charging into adrien’s house and getting his miraculous?

**LB:** keep going…

**RR:** so we just need to get into his house, right? 

conveniently, adrien lives in that very house. so we have a way in

all we have to do is confront hawkmoth when he’s alone and detransformed

and then

just take his miraculous

he won’t even see it coming

**LB:** ok I like the plan

just one issue

what excuse do you plan on telling him to get us all in?

he hates parties

he hates us

**C:** yeah I second that

**RR:** let me think for a minute

**CN:** We could do a brunch thing? Or pretend to work on a school project?

**RR:** ok but hear me out

what if we

**LB:** no.

**RR:** i haven’t even said my idea yet!!!!!

**LB:** I doubt it’s a very good one….

but sure. go ahead

what were you thinking?

**C:** shots fired

rip rena

**RR:** man mari

anyway 

what if we planned a wedding planning party???

**LB:** what??????

**RR:** hear me out.

this man, who is hawkmoth, is going to be desperate to get any dirt he can on ladybug

if we told him ladybug put us in charge of planning it,

don’t tell me he wouldn’t be eavesdropping the whole time

**C:** woah

big brain time

**CN:** I hate to say it but…

That might actually work.

**LB:** let me just get this clear.

we’re going to tell Gabriel that we are Ladybug’s wedding planning committee

we enter his house

we invite him to plan Ladybug’s wedding with us

and then we steal his miraculous?

how did you even come up with this 

…

are you on crack

**RR:** for legal purposes i will not answer that question

**LB:** WHAT

NO DRUGS

ALYA

**RR:** you aren’t my mom >:(

anyway, are we on board with this plan?

**C:** I’m on board with anything you tell me babe ;)

**LB:** I don’t think this is the best idea…

**RR:** i don’t see you coming up with any other ideas

**LB:** …

**CN:** I’ll go text my dad

* * *

_ Direct Message: Marinette to Alya (6:14 am) _

**M:** I literally cannot process the fact that Adrien is Chat Noir

**A:** get over it, girl

you aren’t panicking in the group chat

i know you’ll be fine

…

plus you aren’t the only one panicking

i just found out i’ve been in love with my best friend for two years

**M:** you’ve been in love with Adrien too?

**A:** you’re even worse than that stupid brick

**M:** ??????

**A:** anyway yeah you’ll be fine 

**M:** yeah but in the group chat, I can act calm

on the surface, I’m totally freaking out

I can’t believe I was crushing on the same person

god I love him so much

I just want to bake him a lot of cookies and hug him

**A:** i bet you want a lot more than that ;))))))

anyway don’t worry

like i said before, i’ve got everything planned out

**M:** you know how I feel about your plans…

don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.

**A:** ;)

**M:** ALYA

oh no

please don’t

please I’m begging you

stop whatever you’re planning

oh no

…

I am Scared for my life

* * *

_ Direct Message: Adrien to Nathalie (7:35 am) _

**A:** Good morning, Nathalie! When you have a minute, could you ask Father if I could have a playdate with my friends here at the mansion?

It’s nothing too big. I just wanted Marinette, Nino, and Alya to come over.

**N:** I will ask him as soon as he wakes up, Adrien.

What is the purpose of this meeting?

**A:** Well, uh

You know Ladybug, the superhero?

**N:** Yes.

**A:** And you got the wedding invitation to her wedding, right?

**N:** Yes, I remember that from your Father’s inbox.

Where are you going with this?

**A:** Well, Ladybug entrusted us with some top-secret information and put us in charge of planning her wedding.

…

Nathalie, are you there? It’s been a few minutes.

**N:** Adrien, this is your Father. Meet me downstairs at once.

* * *

_ Chat Noir messaged ‘  _ time to (jokingly) plan a wedding _ ’ (7:41 am) _

**CN:** Wish me luck. I’m going to talk to him now.

**C:** break a leg, dude

not literally but

you know what I mean

**RR:** while they’re talking, you guys should check out what I just posted on the ladyblog

**LB:** you would think you would stop posting now that you know who I am

**RR:** yeah but

now i can post theories that i know totally aren’t about you

and i won’t accidentally out you

**LB:** right. it’s not like you already outed me or anything

**RR:** lb, you’re an icon now. people look up to you

my own sisters want to marry marinette now because ‘ladybug’s doing it so it’s cool’

**LB:** fantastic! I’m a trend now!

**C:** ok so I just checked the ladyblog and I’m mad

option 3 is definitely the best

but most people like option 2?

I don’t get it.

**LB:** ?????

**RR:** go check the ladyblog

and promise me you won’t be mad

**LB:** no promises

…

bahahaha

no way

**RR:** for once she thinks it’s funny lol

**LB:** you really just put a poll on your blog asking which dress you want Ladybug to wear huh

**RR:** ok but hear me out

i’m for option 4 all the way

it would look so good on your slim figure and that neckline is GOD TIER

plus the embroidered flowers on the bodice is so your style

**C:** no no no

the poofy ballgown skirt on option 3 gives off princess vibes 

it would look incredible on Mari

**LB:** you both are ridiculous.

**RR:** which one is your favorite??????

**LB:** idk ask Marinette

whatever one she wants to see me in tbh

**CN:** My father said yes.

I’ll give all of you a ride home from school today 

**RR:** omg my plan worked!

see all of you then

i’m so excited and nervous

**LB:** ok, sounds good Adrien.

see you all at school!

**C:** see you bros

* * *

_ Direct Message: Alya to Marinette (7:57 am) _

**A:** on a scale of 1-10, how nervous are you to see adrien at school

now that you know he’s chat noir and everything

**M:** I’m going to barf

**A:** fantastic.

i’ll bring a hazmat suit

* * *

_ Carapace messaged ‘  _ time to (jokingly) plan a wedding _ ’ (11:11 am) _

**C:** do y’all see the smoke outside

I think there’s an akuma

**RR:** i haven’t gotten an alert yet hold on

**LB:** stop texting. Ms. Bustier is going to notice.

**C:** k

sorry ladybro

**CN:** I don’t know what’s going on outside but it definitely isn’t normal.

Should we go check it out?

**RR:** the alert just came through

we need to start leaving asap

**C:** I just asked Ms. Bustier to use the bathroom and she told me there’s a new protocol

no one is allowed to leave the room during attacks anymore

**LB:** goddamnit

what should we do

**CN:** I’m on it

**RR:** what are you gonna do, sunshine boy?

bribe her?

start a fire?

**CN:** Just watch.

* * *

_ Rena Rouge messaged ‘  _ time to (jokingly) plan a wedding _ ’ (12:24 pm) _

**RR:** i cannot fucking believe that worked

adrien you genius dumbass

**CN:** That’s an oxymoron.

**RR:** yeah you’re a moron too

**LB:** yeah let’s debrief

everyone ok? any wounds?

**C:** it was just Mr. Pigeon again.

that man gets even more idiodic every time

I’m fine

**RR:** idiodic

i’m surrounded by idiots

**CN:** (Says the one who doesn’t know what an oxymoron is)

**RR:** i don’t even have to look up that word to know that a picture of you would be under the definition

i may be illiterate but at least i’m not a dumbass like you

**LB:** refocus everyone!

ok, I’m ok, Cara’s ok.

you two are alright?

**RR:** yes ma’am

just obsessing over adrien’s newfound genius in inventing excuses for us to escape

**CN:** Yes, bugaboo, I’m fine.

I’m purrfect.

**C:** seriously though bro

how did you plan that escape out

**CN:** Honestly, I didn’t plan anything out. 

I didn’t expect Kim to start beating people up

And I definitely didn’t expect Rose to create such a scene

I’ve never seen anyone cry that much

**RR:** huh.

you’re an accidental genius.

...

do that more often

**C:** who knew that people were so passionate over which wedding dress Ladybug should wear

**LB:** you know, normally I’d be upset 

I mean we basically provoked fighting

Ivan has a bloody nose and I’m pretty sure Chloe is missing a chunk of hair

but 

considering the fact that we all got out of there relatively easy, it’s ok

**RR:** chloe deserves it 

that bitch

option 1 would not flatter marinette in any way and she knows that

her mom’s a fashion icon

she would know that

**C:** yeah but the sleeves were pretty

**CN:** I think Lila got the brunt of the attack

She kinda deserved it though

She’s a terrible person

**RR:** yeah and she thought that option 5 was the way to go

option 5 literally looks like a trash bag

**LB:** GUYS!

I don’t care who likes which dress more. 

all that matters is that everyone is ok

**RR:** if the class knew what you were saying now you’d be kicked out

**LB:** this whole wedding thing is getting ridiculous 

get back to class. don’t text again until passing period.

the last thing we need is the teacher reading our texts out loud to the class

**C:** ok mom

* * *

_ Chloe created a Group Chat (1:27 pm) _

_ Chloe added Sabrina, Juleka, Rose, Mylene, Ivan, Max, Kim, Alix, and Nathaniel to the Group Chat (1:34 pm) _

_ Chloe named the Group Chat ‘  _ tea _ ’ (1:36 pm) _

**C:** Hi losers~

I made this stupid chat thing because I needed to discuss something with all of you.

Comment your name and which dress option is your favorite so that we know who you are and I can decide who to kick out.

Did anyone notice who snuck out of class today during the akuma attack?

Because I did.

And I’m pretty sure that something fishy is going on.

Something to do with Ladybug and Chat Noir.

_ *Several people are typing…* _

* * *

_ Chat Noir messaged ‘  _ time to (jokingly) plan a wedding _ ’ (2:13 pm) _

**CN:** Is it just me or is everyone looking at us weirdly?

**C:** I learn to ignore the weird looks bro

don’t think too much about em

**RR:** yeah. i caught rose and juleka in the locker room whispering about something.

all i heard was ‘marinette’

this can’t be good

**LB:** I haven’t noticed anything different huh

**CN:** Regardless, gorilla is here to pick us up

Meet me by the front steps asap

* * *

_ Ladybug messaged ‘  _ time to (jokingly) plan a wedding _ ’ (2:45 pm) _

**LB:** ok we all know the plan right?

and we know plan b just in case it goes wrong?

**CN:** Yeah.

Am I the only one who’s nervous?

**C:** don’t worry bro

I am too

your dad is scary enough without knowing he’s Hawkmoth

plus he gave me the death glare as soon as I walked in the door

that man has my funeral planned out

**RR:** what could go wrong?

i mean, it’s not like he knows we’re superheroes

**LB:** don’t say that

you’ll jinx it

* * *

_ Carapace messaged ‘  _ time to (jokingly) plan a wedding _ ’ (4:02 pm) _

**C:** shit shit shit shit

crap this is a mess

regroup at the eiffel tower in 10

**CN:** I might be a little late

The police are taking me in for questioning

**RR:** mari and i are at the hospital so that probably won’t be possible

**C:** take as long as you need

I’ll be waiting

* * *

_ Chat Noir messaged ‘  _ time to (jokingly) plan a wedding _ ’ (5:43 pm) _

**CN:** I just got released from the police station

I’m heading over to the hospital now

Is Mari ok?

I’m super worried

**C:** I haven’t heard from either of them.

meet me outside the hospital

**CN:** Ok

* * *

_ Ladybug messaged ‘  _ time to (jokingly) plan a wedding _ ’ (6:13 pm) _

**LB:** hey guys

**CN:** LB are you ok??????

What’s going on

They won’t let us inside the hospital

**LB:** I could’ve been better

this could all be fixed if these damn doctors could just leave me alone for a second

then I could ‘miraculous ladybug’ the shit out of my broken leg

**C:** broken leg?????

are you going to be ok?

**LB:** like I said, I’ll be fine as long as I can transform

any chance one of you can cause a distraction

**CN:** On it.

**C:** oh no 

not again

**CN:** Give me five minutes, milady. Hang in there

**LB:** my vision is so blurry I can’t see

**CN:** Where’s Rena

I need help

**C:** these damn receptionists won’t let me in

anything I can help with from the outside?

**CN:** no.

shi

* * *

_ Rena Rouge messaged ‘  _ time to (jokingly) plan a wedding _ ’ (8:32 pm) _

**RR:** i think we can all agree that this was a night from hell

debrief time?

**LB:** I have to make it quick though

my parents want to make sure I get to sleep

they’re worried about me

**C:** jesus ladybug I would be worried about you too

**RR:** so that didn’t exactly go as planned.

**CN:** ‘didn’t exactly go as planned’ is when I take a test and flunk it

It’s a minor inconvenience

‘didn’t exactly go as planned’ is not my father leading us to his secret lair holding you hostage

It’s not my father threatening all of us

It’s not my father shoving Marinette out of the glass window, three stories high

It’s not spending the night in the hospital because of my father

It’s not me losing my fucking mind because the doctors keep saying that they don’t know if Marinette is going to make it or not, she’s lost so much blood

Next thing you know, she’s got a broken leg and internal bleeding and a gash bigger than my face in her arm

So. 

No. 

It didn’t exactly go as we fucking planned it to go.

**LB:** chat

Chat

I’m ok

I’m alive

I fixed everything

**CN:** What if that didn’t work

What if you were dead

**LB:** I know you’re scared and worried

hell we all have some major trauma from this

and I am not a certified therapist

but, chaton, I am perfectly fine.

everything will be ok.

**RR:** the only thing that went well tonight is the fact that we got his miraculous

it’s over

he has nothing now

**C:** is everyone physically ok now? 

Alya I know you got shoved pretty hard there

**RR:** i’m fine. i have a few bruises but other than that i’m fine

**LB:** I’m just glad it’s over.

**C:** yeah

**RR:** me too

**LB:** sleep well guys

I can tell that tomorrow is going to be hell

* * *

_ Direct Message: Adrien to Marinette (9:07 pm) _

**A:** I can’t sleep. 

**M:** hey

it’s ok Adrien

**A:** How many times do I have to tell you that it’s not ok

My father almost killed you

I couldn’t do anything to save you

**M:** you know what?

come over. I have tea and snuggles.

**A:** Give me five

* * *

_ Direct Message: Chat Noir to Ladybug (11:23 pm) _

**CN:** Hey.

I know you’re sleeping

You fell asleep in my arms

But I just wanted to say thank you

You know exactly how to calm me down

I know that everything’s ok now

It’s ok because I have you

…

Ladybug, Marinette- both of you

I love you.

I love all of you.

…

I wanted to kiss you so bad tonight

You’re beautiful 

You’re stunning

You’re everything.

…

I was so scared I was going to lose you today before I got to tell you how I felt

I know you don’t like me the same way

I know you like girls

I know it’s wrong for me to like you but my mind keeps coming back to you

You’re the only thing I have to live for

…

I love you so much it hurts

…

I’ll have to learn to let you go.

_ *Chat Noir deleted a text* _

_ *Chat Noir deleted a text* _

_ *Chat Noir deleted a text* _

_ *Chat Noir deleted a text* _

_ *Chat Noir deleted a text* _

_ *Chat Noir deleted a text* _

_ *Chat Noir deleted a text* _

_ *Chat Noir deleted a text* _

_ *Chat Noir deleted a text* _

_ *Chat Noir deleted a text* _

_ *Chat Noir deleted a text* _

_ *Chat Noir deleted a text* _

_ *Chat Noir deleted a text* _

_ *Chat Noir deleted a text* _

* * *

_ Rena Rouge messaged ‘  _ time to (jokingly) plan a wedding _ ’ (7:44 am) _

**RR:** good morning!

is everyone doing a little bit better?

**C:** I am. 

**LB:** doing a lot better than yesterday, that’s for sure 

:)

**CN:** Ditto.

**RR:** anyone want to start off the day with some wedding planning?

**LB:** I never thought I’d say this, but yeah

a distraction sounds wonderful

**RR:** ok because we have a lot of work to do

and a lot of problems to work through

**CN:** like what?

**RR:** well

since marinette literally can’t marry herself,

she needs someone else to marry her.

**LB:** Alya 

you better not be suggesting what I think you’re suggesting

**RR:** just think:

ladybug gets abandoned at the altar

everyone would be devastated

**C:** what should we do then?

make a clone of Marinette?

**LB:** don’t say it Alya

**RR:** someone else needs to step in to marry her.

any volunteers?

* * *

_ Direct Message: Ladybug to Rena Rouge (8:51 am) _

**LB:** you should absolutely shut up

**RR:** i told you i had a plan

trust me babe

**LB:** I don’t trust anything you have to say right now

**RR:** your loss lol

* * *

_ Chat Noir messaged ‘  _ time to (jokingly) plan a wedding _ ’ (8:53 am) _

**CN:** I can find a few models that I work with that I think Marinette would like

**C:** rena why don’t you do it?

we all know it’s on your bucket list

**RR:** no, it won’t work. i have to be maid of honor.

the bucket list will have to wait

divorce is always an option

**C:** you want to divorce me???????

**RR:** you dimwit

we aren’t even married yet

**C:** ‘yet’

YET

YOU WANT TO GET MARRIEd

**RR:** yes nino

i think i’m in love with you if you didn’t know already

**C:** babe <3

**RR:** <3 <3

anyway

there’s only one person left who could possible marry ladybug

**C:** who? Adrien? lol.

**CN:** Uh give me two seconds

**RR:** sure babe. take your time. think this through

;)

* * *

_ Direct Message: Chat Noir to Ladybug (8:55 am) _

**CN:** Hey are you okay with this?

**LB:** ok with what????

**CN:** You know

Pretending to marry me

**LB:** errnkewfv Chat

you’re such a gentleman

**CN:** Oh sorry.

**LB:** idk it’s probably fine

I’ll have to check with my crush first

**CN:** Oh

That’s fine.

**LB:** is it ok with you?

**CN:** Me? 

Yeah I’m fine with it.

...

What does your crush say?

**LB:** he says he’s fine with it

**CN:** Oh ok

…

Wait

‘He’?

**LB:** yeah?

I just checked with him.

he’s cool with it

**CN:** ‘him’?

…

Oh.

OH.

**LB:** what are you thinking?

**CN:** Uh nothing.

…

Except

Uh

I thought you liked girls?

Sorry I don’t want to be offensive but I thought

**LB:** yeah I do like girls idiot

that’s been announced to the entirety of Paris

**CN:** I’m confused then.

You like girls? But you’re crushing on a boy??

**LB:** have you ever heard of being bi?

…

I guess not lol

you live under a rock

…

yes I like girls

but

I also really like you

**CN:** Me?

Are you texting the right guy?

I’m not your crush

**LB:** uh yeah you kinda are

**CN:** You’re kidding.

**LB:** no

I like you

both sides of you

all of you

**CN:** I must be dreaming

**LB:** nope sorry

this is pretty real

annnnnd I’m probably humiliating myself now…

**CN:** No no no no

You aren’t humiliating yourself

If anything, I’m about to humiliate myself

**LB:** ??????

**CN:** Marinette, I’ve been in love with you for a long time

Hell, I even texted out a confession to you last night

You’re literally perfect

You’re my better half

I love you so much

**LB:** ok Alya

you can cut the crap now

the game’s over and I’m not laughing

**CN:** Where’s Alya?

Is she reading your texts?

**LB:** this really isn’t funny anymore

**CN:** Marinette, this isn’t a joke

It’s Adrien and I’m in love with you

**LB:** are you kidding me

**CN:** No.

**LB:** oh my god

gsrkfsdvfksbdv

...

I’m in love with you too

since the day I met you

and then I fell in love with you again when you became my partner

I love you, Chat Noir, Adrien Agreste

I love you.

**CN:** …

I’m crying, are you crying

**LB:** would you laugh if I said yes

**CN:** Of course not, bugaboo.

Do you wanna go get married now?

**LB:** moving a little quick, aren’t we?

you haven’t even taken me out for dinner yet

**CN:** Tonight. Meet me on the Eiffel Tower. 9:00.

**LB:** it was a joke

you don’t have to

**CN:** I want to.

Plus, my schedule is pretty free now that my father’s in jail

**LB:** oh. 

alright then :)

in the meantime, we should probably text Alya back lol

**CN:** Good idea haha

* * *

_ Chat Noir messaged ‘  _ time to (jokingly) plan a wedding _ ’ (9:27 am) _

**CN:** Ok, yeah I can marry Marinette.

**RR:** where did you guys go? it’s been like thirty minutes

**LB:** we were talking.

**RR:** about....?

**LB:** wouldn’t you like to know ;)

**C:** anyway yeah

that works perfectly

Alya and I are working out the details now

but this wedding is going to be a huge hit

**CN:** Yeah. I’m just working out one final detail.

**RR:** and that is?

**CN:** I have to ask Marinette’s dad for her blessing.

**LB:** grbgtnfewkdefeg

* * *

_ * Sometime later, on April 1st* _

_ Rena Rouge messaged ‘  _ time to (jokingly) plan a wedding _ ’ (11:25 pm) _

**RR:** here’s the recording I got from the wedding

_ *sent  _ _ video.mp4 _ _ * _

_ *Loading video…* _

_ *Download complete.* _

_ *Begin recording?  _ **_Yes_ ** _ or  _ _ No _ _.* _

Marinette, clad in her perfect white dress, twiddled her perfectly manicured thumbs. “But, what if-”

Alya smoothed down the said dress one last time. “No worrying. Everything is fine.”

“Ok.” Marinette checked the mirror, wrestling a stray piece of hair into her bun. “But-”

“Nope!” The brunette smiled at Marinette. “You look stunning. Adrien will be so surprised that he won’t be able to say his vows.”

At this, Marinette paled. “Oh, god. What if he-”

“None of that.” Alya checked her watch. “It's time to go. I have to transform, babe. No freaking out, no fretting, no nothing. Everything’s going to be fine.”

“Okay, Alya.” She gazed at the other girl. “You really are insane. This is going to be the only thing people talk about for weeks.”

“That’s the plan, girl,” Alya responded and blew a kiss at her before walking out the door.    
  


Marinette, waiting eagerly for her cue, fought the urge to throw up. Tikki flew over, a huge smile plastered on her face. “Marinette, you’re so gorgeous.”

“Thanks, Tikki.” Marinette sighed. “I really want this to go well. I’m so worried that-”

“-that people aren’t going to like you once they figure out who you are?” Tikki shook her head. “You know that’s not true. Everyone loves you.”

“I guess.” The music started playing, signaling Marinette’s nerves to amplify. “Oh god.”

“Go,” Tikki whispered. “Remember, you’re Ladybug. You got this.”

Marinette sighed. “Right, I’m Ladybug.”

She stepped out into the light.

Immediately, she tripped and nearly face planted. Luckily, her dad was nearby and caught her. She shot him a quick ‘thank you’ before turning to the swarm of people surrounding her. Shrugging, she offered them a sheepish smile, which earned her a hearty chuckle from the crowd.

There was no turning back now. She smiled at her dad and gave him a small hug before making her way to the altar with him.

She took her place in front of a transformed Alya and Nino, as planned.

The stand-in priest, Jagged Stone, smiled broadly at the girl.

Marinette waited in anticipation for her bride, keeping the crowd stuck in a suspenseful limbo. She even made a show of checking the delicate watch on her wrist before glancing fearfully at Jagged.

“Should we just get started?” Jagged whispered to Marinette, but because of his microphone, all of Paris was hanging onto his every word.

Marinette nodded her head slightly in response.

“Citizens of Paris,” Jagged announced, “we gather here today to celebrate the union of Marinette Dupain-Cheng and Ladybug.”

“Where’s Ladybug?” A random voice in the crowd called out, asking the question that everyone wanted to know.

“Right here,” a spotted figure shouted, standing on top of a nearby building. Anyone could tell that this was not, in fact, Ladybug.

“Chat Noir?” Someone called out. “Is that you as Mister Bug again?”

The same voice as before yelled, “Where’s Ladybug?”

Chat Noir (Mister Bug? Adrien?) smiled. “Yes, it is Chat Noir. Ladybug let me know that she couldn’t make it to the wedding, so I am here to fill in for her.”

A few people laughed in the audience before realizing he was being completely serious. He sidled up next to Jagged, smiling. “I’m ready.”

Jagged looked him up and down. “I don’t think you are, son.”

Adrien smiled. “Right, let me change my outfit. Tikki, spots off.”

When he promptly detransformed to reveal Chat Noir in a poofier wedding dress than Marinette’s, the crowd gasped. 

Marinette sniffled slightly. “Chat Noir, where’s Ladybug? I don’t want to marry you.”

Everyone was silent as Chat Noir grinned at Marinette. “Milady, you already know the answer to that question. Stop tricking these poor people. Tell them the truth.”

He unfastened the earrings from his ears and silently handed them to Marinette. Marinette, in turn, brought out a shiny wedding ring from her pocket. They swapped jewelry, and no one had a clue what to expect. The duo smirked at each other.

When Chat Noir slipped the ring onto his right hand, next to his miraculous, Marinette giggled. “Sill kitty, you know that goes on your left hand.”

Which prompted her to take off both of his rings and slip them onto his left ring finger. He detransformed in a flash of green.

At first, everyone was too shocked to say anything.

The final straw was when Adrien put the earrings in Marinette’s ears and she shouted out “Tikki, spots on!”

It was pure chaos. The crowd was in such a state of pandemonium that the ceremony couldn’t continue for another half an hour.

_ *End of video. Exit?  _ **_Yes_ ** _ or  _ _ No _ _.  _

**RR:** it went pretty good!

i’m just glad I convinced master fu to video the whole thing

**C:** I like the outfits the most

putting Chat in a wedding dress? genius.

**LB:** yeah well your decision to have the reveal like that was genius too

**CN:** It really will be the only thing everyone talks about for months.

I’m just happy it was finally safe enough for us to reveal our identities, with Hawkmoth being gone.

**LB:** me too

**C:** I second that

**RR:** now that the chaos is over, wanna stop by my house for a game and movie night?

**LB:** sorry, Alya, but Adrien and I already have something planned

**RR:** wow. 

something more important than your best friend?

**CN:** Let’s just say, it is our wedding night.

;)

**C:** I don’t trust that winky face

**RR:** haha nice try

you guys aren’t gonna do anything over pg-13

i know both of you too well

...

right guys?

**LB:** ;)

**RR:** oh god

nino

**C:** what

**RR:** i’m scared

**C:** what could go wrong?

they’re both innocent

**RR:** last time you said that, we ended up in the hospital

**C:** shit

**RR:** i’m putting on my shoes now. i’ll pick you up in five.

we have some supervising to do tonight 

**C:** ok

* * *

_ Chat Noir named the Group Chat ‘  _ the wedding has been planned; time for the afterparty’ _ (12:56 pm) _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> adrien would say 'playdate' instead of 'hang out' and you cannot convince me otherwise lol
> 
> anyway please consider commenting and leaving kudos! I hope you enjoyed this unplanned extra chapter :)


End file.
